I found out this week that my uncle died. He was the baby boy of the family on my dad's side and was as gentle and kind a man as there ever was.
It turns out the entire family on that side is sick or dying.
One had a heart attack.
Another had one too.
One had a stroke.
One has cancer.
Dad does as well.
That's just the blood relatives.
The 'married into' relatives are either just as messed up or already gone.
They are all in their early 60's to late 70's.
Very young.
That doesn't exactly bode well for my future since I tend to take after that side of the family, but I swear to you I am not like them and never have been.
--
For as long as I can remember that entire side of the family has been "old".
I can't recall a time when I didn't think they were absolutely ancient.
I sincerely can't remember a time they ever had any fun.
Anytime there was a holiday they would get together and literally sit around. Seriously they wouldn't do anything but sit.
--
When I think about my family back home I think "I never fit in" and never felt like I wanted to.
When I think of that side of the family I think of Archie Bunker.
The guy was in his 50's on TV, but acted as though he was in his late 70's.
If you ever saw the show you would remember.
Times have changed and I'm at the forefront of it.
We all live in a world where we say to ourselves 'I could die today'.
Tonight.
No one is promised tomorrow - or even anything close.
Why live as though you're already dead?
I have never felt my age.
I never wanted to.
I simply wanted to have fun and enjoy life.
Not be old.
Not work at the factory all my days.
Not always walk around with an ashen face saying 'woe is me, life is so tough, take me to Glory'.
That kind of thinking and mentality is a closed door to me - and so I've closed it.
I wanted to live. Go. Do. BE.
Find Open Doors and Opportunity - all day, every day.
Enjoy it all.
I wanted more from the moment I was born.
And I went looking for whatever "more" was.
Naples, Glendale, Manhattan, Connecticut, Atlanta, Las Vegas, Temecula, Tempe.
I've been in states all over this country because years ago I took a job installing large scale computer networks.
I've seen a lot.
Done a lot more.
I may end up where I started - right down the road from my family - but I didn't stay there my entire life.
Lot of people do that.
Born, raised, stay, die right where they are.
Sure, you can find Open Doors and Opportunity in your own back yard. You don't have to leave, travel, or turn your back on all your friends and family. But if you're searching for a life of adventure and you long for something 'more', you have to look everywhere.
--
Maybe my family all lived exactly how they wanted to live - and they're happy with their lives.
I look at them and I'm disappointed.
Saddened really.
They are going to die without having ever even attempted to live.
That's what I think.
But maybe they think they've done it all.
Enjoyed it all.
Had, done, and seen it all.
Maybe their lives wasn't as bad for them as I make it out to be because that wasn't the life I wanted for myself.
--
My uncle was a good man and will be missed.
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